- Our holiday portraits have been taken and ordered and will be ready to be picked up by Wednesday.
- Our holiday cards have been created and sent to the printer and should arrive by next week some time.
- Santa has been visited and informed; photo was taken.
- I am 90% finished with my holiday shopping. Gifts have been wrapped AND hidden.
- I'm putting up my Christmas tree tomorrow.
I am genuinely surprised at my efficiency. I don't know where this motivation is coming from, especially when I am the size of Santa Claus (possibly larger) and have a very crazy toddler, a needy dog, and a crazy, needy husband at home. Part of me wonders if it's somehow being driven by my subconscious feeling that Baby 2.0 isn't going to stay in for as long as the docs are saying. Maybe a freakish mommy part of me knows that I need to get this shit done and is giving me the willpower, energy, whatever to do it. I wish that same drive would tell me to put my laundry away, but that's here nor there.
Along with the holiday cheer, I have to share our experience with Santa this year. We had a deal from Sears that for $10 you get to take the picture with Santa and get a few sheets of photos. You also have an appointment time! In the past we've just tried to show up at the mall when we thought no one would be there. Typically we had to wait in line for way too long and then they murder you (with holiday cheer, of course) with the cost of the photos they take. I recall in the past it was upwards of $30++ and you get like, two 5x7's. They even choose which pose they think is best and generally (in my experience) don't even show you what the other options were. I was delighted at this Sears offer and wondered if there was a catch.
The catch? None. Aside from the fact Santa was a little bit weird and kept saying "Ho, ho, ho! Santa needs some Starbucks!" He was a pretty legit looking Santa. Child 1.0 did not appreciate how real he looked. As soon as we walked in to the little studio, he shut down. He sat on Santa's lap and with a terrified, forced smile, took a picture. Luckily the picture popped up on the screen and I immediately told the lady we were going to need some time. I didn't know that time was going to be forty-five minutes. Child 1.0 had a few breakdowns (he was really freaked out by this Santa guy) and a lot of arguing, claiming he didn't want any presents and just wanted to go home. We have been making our "list" for weeks now and he's been reciting it pretty consistently. He even pretends to call Santa on his fake cell phone and talks to him. We walked around Sears trying to get him to a happy place and finally I had enough. I decided I was going all or nothing and taking him back to that studio whether he liked it or not. I was even willing to put him onto Santa screaming and crying and get that picture. All of Child 1.0's pictures with Santa are of him happy as can be but go figure that by Christmas #4 he wasn't cooperating. I march his ass back to the studio and we were able to walk right back in immediately. Child 1.0 bounces up in Santa's face and yells, "MERRR!!!" I don't know what merrr is, but it is a loud, sudden sound that makes most people jolt---including Santa. Child 1.0 was laughing hysterically at his success at scaring Santa, and jumped right in his lap and was cheesing like nothing had even occurred. He started rattling off the most random "want list" ever, including things like t-shirts, new shoes, and hats (which I worried made us look like we needed DCFS to come down the chimney instead). When he was done, he told me he was ready for his "treat." In the heat of his meltdown, I may or may not have bribed him with a toy. I figured he was shouting so loudly that he didn't hear me say, "Just take a good picture and you can go into the Disney Store and pick WHATEVER you want---ANYTHING!!!!"
He heard it. He happily bounced into the store, and what seemed to be intentional, took his sweet ass time looking at every.damn.thing. in the store. Luckily he has cheap taste because this venture only came to be $4.97. When factored in to the cost of the portrait package, it was still half the cost of what we would have paid the usual mall Santa PLUS we get more prints, so it's hard to even put a price on it. Hell yeah.
Ho, ho, ho! Mommy needs some Starbucks!